I spent my appointment with wonderful psychologist either in tears or vacantly staring into the abyss. I had spent pretty much my entire appointment with my doctor in tears as well.
11 December 2013
9 December 2013
7 December 2013
I never actually thought this would come up at work. I suppose I was just being naive. Perhaps it was just that I hadn't been doing any of that work for a lot of years. I had left it for my colleague as I just felt that I couldn't do it. I never imagined that there would be these types of things.
6 December 2013
2 December 2013
I went it was okay.
I was given a different perspective on it by someone earlier in the day. It was the group asking me not wonderful psychologist personally. There is a difference and once it was pointed out it make complete sense.
I even stayed until everyone else started leaving. I had been thinking about leaving quickly however it wasn't too bad. I did know most of the people there and there wasn't quite as many people as I thought. Around the 20 but I coped. I am really pleased that I went and proud of how well I coped.
I really need to learn to not see the most catastrophic eventuality in situations. I hope that will come in time.
1 December 2013
I think the lines have blurred and I am quite worried about what will happen.
My last speech tomorrow night and because of other circumstances it is to be at their Christmas party. I have done my speech and made the prop to go with it. I am anxious about doing it at their Christmas party given that I will go from speaking in front of 6 people to a large group.
However most of my anxiety/concern/worry/fear is centred around the fact that the Christmas party is at wonderful psychologist's property. When the idea was initially suggested there was a number of people around and I couldn't ask if it was appropriate. I know that sometime in the past two weeks I should have said something but I kept trying to convince myself that it is fine. I am not sure it is though.