Okay, so I never expected first contact to be "the one". I also never expected to wake up this morning and find that the whole conversation and even his profile in my matches would be gone...
Not taking these things personally is going to be really hard for me I think. At the moment I am just a little confused. I don't know how these sites work. I am assuming he did something on his end to finish/block contact. I messaged the help centre to ask. Is that silly?
Okay, so I posted on Thursday that I had been convinced to sign up with an online dating website.
The website has a little guided "get to know you" thing. It starts out with "Quick Questions". So I received that from a guy on Thursday evening. I looked at his profile and he seemed okay. I answered the questions and sent my own. He replied and they were okay replies.
It has taken a little while for me to process this past appointment.
Lovely psychiatrist keeps building onto the "scene" that he uses to take me back. Some little thing will come up. A word or a visual and he will add that in. He added a new word in this appointment. It came up in my last appointment, running over and over in my head. It was like getting slapped.
There are times when something is done that there is no way that sorry is enough but that is all you have.
I am sorry.
I am so sorry to the person I hurt.
I feel like saying it out loud to the person wasn't enough. I don't expect anything in return for saying out loud to the person nor by putting it here. I won't expand on it further here. I will tell my professionals and talk it through with them.